Palmer Eldritch: “God promises Eternal life. I can do better; I can deliver it”

Supposedly, I told SK that I would summarize my thoughts on the Philip K. Dick book: Three stigmata of Palmer Eldritch. So here it is.

The word stigmata means mark associated with a particular incident generally disgraceful. In this book, I thought the old definition would fit well. Stigmata are the marks on Christ’s body after the Crucifixion. For people more familiar with Hindi movies - the tattoo that Vijay (Amitabh Bachchan) has on his left forearm in the movie Deewar would be considered a stigmata. Though in his case, it was the disgraceful incident of his father that he had to bear.

The book deals with what we call as reality and also God. Now now … lets not get carried away with the usual organized religion definitions of God. Think of the definitions from the Gita, Upanishads, Buddhism, Taoism. Very nicely summarized as: The Tao that can be thought of or spoken about is not the real Tao.

Palmer Eldritch is a guy who travels to Pluto and comes back with a new drug called Chew-Z. This drug is meant to replace the existing drug called Can-D. The latter is mainly used by the people who are sent to Mars and they use this drug to temporarily escape from dull life. Competition. The person who runs Can-D wants to have Chew-Z banned. While Can-D is a temporary ‘fix’, Chew-Z is better in that, it lets people live a life that they would like to have in their dream world. The details in the book - pre-cogs and such - are classic PKD, so won’t bore anyone with those.

Now, here’s where the story gets beautiful. Palmer Eldritch inserts himself into these dreams. He is characterized by the so-called three stigmata: a robotic right hand, artificial eyes and steel teeth. Eldritch is now capable of living in other people. It seems that once people come out of their drug-induced dreams a part of Eldritch is now in them. No escape.

The reason why Eldrich would be God or obtained some kind of God-like properties from Pluto is hinted in a few sentences. I have listed a couple:

1. “He had great power. He could overcome death”.

2. (Spoken about Eldritch) “He really exists, really is there. Although not like we’ve thought and not like we’ve experienced him up to now.

He can’t help us very much. Some maybe. But he stands with empty, open hands; he understands, he wants to help. He tries, but …. it’s just not that simple. Don’t ask me why. Maybe even he doesn’t know. Maybe it puzzles him too. Even after all the time he’s had to mull over it”.

Clearly, PKD is thinking/questioning two things: reality and god.

Here’s what I think. I like the definition of reality as described in the Upanishads or the Matrix. Maya - the source of all illusion. Yawn.  God is an abstract idea that humans have created. Now here’s a strange conundrum I just realized. In the Gita, Mr. Krishna Yadav tells Mr. Arjun Pandu says that we should treat and think about everything the same. The stone and the block of gold. Wouldn’t that mean that the word God and the corresponding concept is just another step in attaining Moksha? Therefore should be rejected at the appropriate time in the appropriate life?

Okay, I just stepped into something that I haven’t really thought about. Better to stay away. Thats the thing about PKD books. Makes you think about reality and all that.

Mind wandering into thinking about these things. Will stop writing about PKD now. Not much of a summary but it is what it is.

Before I sign off, I am currently reading the short stories of Saadat Hassan Manto. Urdu writer from Independence/Partition days. Recommended by my sister. Loving what I have read so far.

Late night work last night. Woke up late this morning. 6.30, I think. Oh well.

Made calls in the morning. Felt like a fool an hour later. Felt like a kid who is given a wonderful kayak and who instead of paddling out into the ocean and enjoying the sunset, bitches about how the colors of the sunset are not the right hue. Oh well.

This story of my lack of understanding could have been a short story with morals in the Amar Chitra Katha. I wished life was like the ‘Connect-the-dots’ pictures. Unfortunately, unlike those pictures, life’s pictures do not have numbers to make the task easier.  Oh well.

Sat the day in front of TV watching Lord of the Rings. Such a moving story. Should read the book sometime. Oh well.

In the lab now, trying to work. Maybe I will head down to the Scripps Pier and watch the sunset. Say thanks for the wonderful people in my life. Since the mood is a bit low, I will also mope that SK is not in my arms when I watching the sun go over to the other side of the planet. (Take that Copernicus!)  Oh well.

I wanted to do so many things today. Well …. mainly run programs to try and figure out why my protein structure will not refine. The day and the work is going too slow and I am getting pissed at myself.

I have stayed away from the blog for a long time too. Anyhow. I got a couple of requests: gaalis for surviving in Bombay. I will most certainly do so …… soon. Haha.  Kulti for now.

Okay just to tick people off - Yes, I still think it is Bombay Central and not Mumbai Central. Haha.

Growing up in India invariably meant visiting relatives during the summer vacations. For me it was either heading to Delhi (North India), Kerala (South India) or sometimes Baroda (West). Now, since we live in the Central suburbs, I was (and still am) fascinated by the western suburbs. Going to Delhi or Baroda was always special. Cool relatives. Also, it meant taking a train from Bombay Central.

What a station! I felt, as a kid, that all trains in India left from and arrived there. It felt that big. It was like Bombay VT. The tracks ended there! The trains couldn’t go any further. The same thing for the long distance trains from Bombay Central.

When I started my Masters at TN Medical College (Nair Hospital), it meant getting off at Central. I was genuinely excited. When one is walking on the bridge, you could see the long-distance trains. The bridge itself is a great place for people watching.

Good times. Good times.

PS. Next post will be on the Da Vinci days in Corvallis.

“Why the need to control our own thoughts?”

It is inherent in our nature to let the mind to roam around wherever. A spiritual answer would be that we have to keep it in check and focus our efforts towards a purpose. This purpose could be the completion of the task at hand to the best of our abilities. I have always leaned toward a spiritual need for the purpose. I am sure people have different views about this. To each his own.

“How much do other people’s actions or words affect our own thoughts?”

(I have to state the obvious first - I am only speaking for myself).  I am very much influenced by my friend’s and family’s words and actions. Very much. Trust comes easily. With trust comes the standards I set for myself and others. This trust is an absolute blessing most of the time. A comfort during tough times. However, it can also be the wall that one builds around oneself. A wall that one builds so well that it becomes nearly impossible to break. A curse.

The dual nature of trust (that one places on others) is evident. Once this awareness comes, it would be foolish to delve into it anymore. (The dual nature of everything around us. Now that I will leave for a later time). It is crucial, according to me, to ponder on how to break free from this duality. True freedom comes when one is first aware of the chains that bind and then breaks away from the chain. Digression: (Adapted from the boy with the spoon) - Wisdom, in this case,  would be to realize that there are no chains).

This brings us back to the influence other people have on our thoughts. I have now realized that it is not the other person but it is only me who reacts. It is not without but within.

To expect trust and love from others is wrong.  However, when it comes to you, one should be grateful. Easier said than done. This brings us back to the first question I posited. The need to discipline one’s mind to keep itself within. To look for beauty within. If someone comes along and shares something beautiful (love and trust), then to accept it. I think this would result in the mind becoming completely open and yet not wandering. It would be open for everything - trust, love, heartbreak, jealousy, laughter, sadness, laziness, vigor. Everything.

Have been waking up later than usual. The eyes open at around 5.45 and am awake around 6.15. Late for me but its great too. Had a wonderfully relaxing weekend at the Makwana home in LA.

I have been working on multiple things lately - in the lab and in my personal front. Like most other people, I get the feeling that I don’t have complete control over my things. It is the tasks in the day that control me rather than the other way around. I don’t mean this in a superficial manner but rather on the level of the mind. Once the task begins, I am completely into it physically but mentally I am all over the place.

This doesn’t mean that I do not spend quality time on my experiments. I do. My mind goes into this hyper-activity zone. I can think of a hundred different things at the same time. However, when all this involves other people, it can get quite difficult.

These days I have been questioning my need to be in control and the way it has been affecting my thought process.

Some basic questions: Why the need to control our own thoughts? How much do other people’s actions affect our own thought process? How rational are we when we react to other people’s words and actions? How much do our past experiences influence the way we feel today?

I think I might have come up with answers - right or wrong, I don’t know.

So much for being prompt about writing. Tor, my apologies. I can only give you an usual scientist excuse - a deadline. Better late than never, they say.

I have never thanked you. I realize that you would think I don’t really have to thank you, but I feel I should.

Thank you for being. You certainly opened my mind about a lot of things. Good experiences for me.

Anyway, you left in 2002, if I am not mistaken or was it 2003. I remember vaguely that you had finished your studies at OSU and were headed to W country. I was somewhat preoccupied with my own things to notice life around me. I was most certainly stressed about a lot of things.

2003 was a very difficult year for me. A time for getting my priorities right. Questions I had to answer for myself. ‘Did I really love science?’ ‘Was it love or was it the idea of being in love (apologies to Pink Floyd)?’ ‘Was I cut out to be a scientist?’ ‘Did I really believe in myself or was it I was reassured constantly by the confidence people has me?’

By the end of the year, I had answered all these questions.

There are days like today when I just can’t seem to do anything. Days like these, I wish I was sipping chai and reading a book. I wouldn’t want to be out in a lawn or anything. A comfortable couch will just work fine ’cause that way I can take naps.

Laziness must be ‘inertia’ for me. Its almost as if  laziness is my native state and any work that I have to do would require me to waste energy.

Maybe I should brew myself a cup of tea now ……

My first post. Not my first time writing, though. Written a few scientific papers but thats a story for another day. Lately have been reading a few blogs on the web. Not the politics-based ones but general ones which give a glimpse into someone else’s mind.

I will describe myself in a later post - what I do, why I do what I do etc. When I am in the mood to do so.

Alright. Now about the title of my post. I figured since the first step is always the most difficult, I will start with something that I am very comfortable with - Movies. (Science was also a possibility but since I just finished with my day here which was full of experiments, I don’t want to talk about it for now).

Thinking about movies and dialogs. I remember having conversations with my grandfather a few years back. He would always quote some famous author (Dickens, Shakespeare, Hardy and so on) when he wanted to make a point. Clearly this required a good memory about the book which would in turn, mean that he had read that book with great care. I don’t claim to be a voracious reader but I do have the habit of reaching for a book instead of the remote. However, I really cannot quote these books. When I feel like making a point in a conversation, the only things that come to my head are movie dialogs. It could be any movie, independent of language, culture, national or regional origin.

I don’t know the reason for this. Its not that I don’t read the books carefully. I remember the names of characters from books and what happened to them. Perhaps its the generation that I belong too. A generation that is sandwiched between the ‘Shakespeare’ folks and the ‘how r u? i m doing gr8′ kids. A generation that knew Vijay’s pain when he lay dying in the temple. A generation that said Yippee Kayay with John Mclane. A generation that wished Jai wouldn’t have to die near the bridge. A generation that couldn’t understand how Aida could be so attached to her piano ……

No answer to the question and …….. the juice just ran out, so I will stop here.

G

P.S. The book I am reading right now is - Haruki Murakami’s The Wind-up Bird Chronicle.